Ryan Abramowitz is the author of Elegy for an Elephant, a children’s picture book inspired by his family’s journey to process and repair from the loss of his father through suicide. Ryan spoke to Independent Publishing about his process for writing on a sensitive topic, the collaboration he undertook, and the learning opportunities available to others who are interested in picture book writing and illustration.

Please tell us what your book Elegy for an Elephant is about.

Elegy for an Elephant is a story of three children seeking their father’s soul, after Elysium the elephant ends his own life. It is inspired by my family’s processing of, and repair from, the lived experience of losing our father to suicide. As flippers fold into feathers, Wonder the whale, Grace the swallow and Hope the dove embark on a journey of acceptance and healing.

The book was designed as a support resource, created in dialogue with mental health professionals. It is offered as a warm embrace and beacon of hope for readers navigating grief, and for the families and communities supporting them in their mourning. At its heart, Elegy for an Elephant honours ways we can connect with loved ones we have lost, and the timeless nature of love. I hope all those who read this book will feel seen, supported and carried in their healing journey. As 18 means life in Judaism, 18% of profits are being donated to Lifeline, Movember and Jesuit Support After Suicide Services.

Please tell us a little bit about yourself and what your background is with writing and as an artist.

I was born in South Africa, but gratefully call Melbourne home. As an oceanic soul I’m in Port Phillip Bay (nearly) every day. Having grown up in Sydney, I did my honours in design studies at the University of New South Wales. I moved down to Melbourne to study a Masters of Marketing and Management (University of Melbourne) and feel it’s a kind city offering a vibrant happening of literature and arts. I currently work in marketing and communications in the not-for-profit space, but prior to this held similar roles in freelance and corporate settings.

Elegy for an Elephant is the first time I have done any sustained piece of writing beyond any tertiary education. As an artist, I can’t remember a time when I didn’t love a pencil or paintbrush in my hand. My heart has such an affinity with water and undersea divinity (that explains why, in the book, an elephant, a lioness, a whale and two birds live in a coral reef.) I also run a business, Today Tomorrow Forever, through which I paint wedding certificates and other bespoke artworks that celebrate love and life milestones.

I understand your book addresses a sensitive, complicated topic—one that you have had experience with in your own life—which is dealing with the loss of a loved one by suicide. I’m interested in knowing your approach to creating this book as a support resource for other people who are also grieving the loss of someone to suicide.

Creating this book presented challenges in terms of striking the right balance between something that had a substantial narrative arc with character development and followed the conventions of a picture book, whilst also fulfilling its role as a support resource for those in grief. Across the material I read in the initial literature review, and from my own lived experience, are reflections around the textures of grief that can be more specific and nuance to suicide bereavement. These can include shame, abandonment and guilt for what was (and wasn’t) done to have changed the outcome of someone taking their life.

There isn’t enough material out there that the mental health care community can use in unpacking this, and picture books are especially accessible formats to address such challenging subject matter for younger and older audiences alike. In turn, the book was designed in consultation with Roses in the Ocean and Jesuit Support after Suicide services (organisations who support those bereaved by suicide) as a prompt for these conversations in safe spaces. I also wrote the manuscript in close collaboration and dialogue with many mental health care providers such as child psychologists, suicide bereavement researchers and grief counsellors, together with my sisters, whose voices are folded into the story. This peer review was important to ensure the book is as sensitive and non-activating in its engagement with the subject matter as possible.

How did you approach the creative side of making a book that would be in tribute to your father?

My father was a gentle giant, born in South Africa (as was my whole family). It was during those long nights of lockdown that I imagined his soul as an elephant crossing the night sky. From these initial images, the rest of the book unfolded. Elephants have long been used as metaphors for mental illness, and of course ‘the elephant in the room’—the stigmas and illnesses present but sometimes ignored. I am always curious about what animals people see themselves reflected through—it became the basis for the characters of this story.

I feel that having a family of different animals can make the book relatable to a wider audience as we can see different qualities of ourselves in different animals. Anthropomorphism is a wonderful way of transcending many of the biases human protagonists or characters may exude through their appearances or any other physical stereotype. My mother and twin sisters both chose their animals (a lioness and birds, respectively) while I chose a whale because of my deep oceanic affinity and reverie for them.

How will you be making your book available, and how will you be approaching the publicity side of your book to help ensure it reaches your audience?

The book is timed to be released on World Suicide Prevention Day—September 10, 2023. It is available online at Narratives of Nature, and from November, will also be available from bookstores Australia-wide. In terms of the publicity and touch points with media and book reviewers, I engaged Julia Ferracane from Righteous PR. She has a vibrant energy that has been wonderful to work with.

I have been in touch with many mental health organisations and professionals during the making of Elegy for an Elephant and am sharing it with them, as many of the people they support through their programs and initiatives are the very audience I had in mind when creating this book. These organisations across the mental health landscape, including Griefline, Lifeline, Kids Helpline, Feel the Magic, Movember and Support After Suicide Services, together with individual clinicians, have all agreed to share the book upon its release. Therefore, having these conversations was really important in helping Elegy for an Elephant to find its way to the world.

Can you tell us about any services you used in the process of publishing your book and what your experience was like with them?

I feel honoured to have encountered such talented and dedicated people throughout this project. Before writing the manuscript, I undertook the Writing Picture Books Fundamentals Course with the Australian Writers Centre. This was a solid foundation to learn about the genre, and have since then enrolled in their self-paced Writing Picture Books Masterclass.

Author and picture book mentor Margrete Lamond came on board as the editor and art director. Being the author, illustrator and publisher of this book, I feel incredibly grateful to have worked with someone whose skill set could support both the writing and the art. Margrete has a treasure trove of wisdom in children’s literature and visual neuroscience, and really challenged me to bring a greater degree of refinement and resolution to the piece.

Danielle Bluff from Rhubarb Swoon did the typesetting. (I had initially thought I was also going to do the typesetting myself, but am relieved I didn’t; I was so burnt out by the end.) She brought a fresh eye to the work and introduced a dual typographic system, which helps to differentiate the children’s voices from the narrator. Peribo are the distributors of Elegy for an Elephant, and from the outset I was moved by their gracious response to the project and shared vision to help this book get reach in the world.

Do you have plans to write and publish more books in the same way? Is there anything during the creation stage of Elegy for an Elephant that you would have done differently, if you were to have your time again?

This was a heavy and challenging piece to do, as the making of this picture book required me to revisit my father’s suicide in such a frequent, intense and creatively demanding way. I was therefore reluctant to submit the manuscript to a publisher, as it may have extended the amount of time that would be required for rework. Needing to release this book into the world for my own mental health preservation, I created Narratives of Nature as the entity through which to self-publish it.

I now can see Narratives of Nature being a space for future stories and picture books, which explore our human nature through expressions of the natural world. ‘A Whale’s Tale’ (my first book) has been beached since 2021 and is patiently waiting to be rescued. My sketch diary is brimming with many concepts and drawings involving animal allegories and botanical motifs. With all these exciting ideas I have, I’m delighted with my decision to self-publish, because it means these books already have a nursery waiting for them to be born.

What advice would you share to someone looking to publish their first book?

This past year I enrolled in five different courses across picture book writing and illustration to hone my craft and further my learning. Comparing the first draft of ‘A Whale’s Tale’ (done prior to any education of the genre) with the first storyboarded draft of Elegy for an Elephant (done after) demonstrated how much I had grown and developed. Try to dip your feet into as many relevant learning opportunities as you can. Spend hours in the library and bookshops getting a pulse for what else is out there in your field, what inspires you and where you think your work could offer something unique. I love ending the day by getting into bed with a picture book and reading it to my inner child. This has expanded and deepened my awareness of the existing visual vocabulary. As I fall asleep, I then start to dream of my own.

For more information about Elegy for an Elephant and to purchase a copy, go to Ryan’s website Narratives of Nature.